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Browsing Posts in Jokes

Arab sends an e-mail to his Dad saying:

 
Dear Dad,
 
Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here, but Dad, I am bit ashamed to arrive to my college in my Gold Mercedes, when all My Teachers & colleagues travel by train.
 
Nasser
 
 *****************

Sometime later Nasser gets reply to his e-mail from his Dad:
 
Loving son,
 
Twenty Million Dollars transferred to your account, please stop embarrassing us, go and get yourself a train too.
 
Dad

I was in 12th
She was in 12th

I got B.Tech
She got BCA

I was doing B.Tech
She got MBA

I was preparing 4 M.TECH enterance
She got married

I m doing M.TECH
She’s d mother of 2 children

I got PH.D
Her daughter is in 1st std.

I became DOCTRATE
Her daughter passed 10th,

I have joined job.
Her daughter joined college.

The greatest irony-
“Today is my ENGAGMENT & her daughter is my FIANCEE”.
           

    AGLE  JANAM commerce hi lunga….. :(

Shaadi ke pehle -Maine Pyar Kiya

Shaadi ke baad – Ye Maine Kya Kiya?

Shaadi ke pehle – Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
Shaadi ke baad – Kuch Nahi Hota Ha

Shaadi ke pehle – Dil To Pagal Hai
Shaadi ke baad  – Dil To Pagal Tha

Shaadi ke pehle – Ek Duje Ke Liye
Shaadi ke baad – Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye

Shaadi ke pehle – Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge

Shaadi ke baad  – Baaki Log Sukhi Ho Jayenge

Shaadi ke pehle – Chandramukhi
Shaadi ke baad – Jwaalamukhi

Shaadi ke pehle – Kuwara Baap
Shaadi ke baad  – Bechara Baap

Shaadi ke pehle – Titanic
Shaadi ke baad  – Mortgage

Shaadi ke pehle – Hum Aapke Hai Koun?
Shaadi ke baad – Barbadi Ka Reason

Shaadi ke pehle – Aao Pyar Karen
Shaadi ke baad   – Aur Bhi Kuch Kaam Karen?

Shaadi ke pehle – chal chayya chayya
Shaadi ke baad – ah aab laut chale

Shaadi ke pehle – hum aapke dil main rehte hain
Shaadi ke baad  – hum apke ghar main rehte hain

Shaadi ke pehle – arzoo
Shaadi ke baad  – asoo

Shaadi ke pehle – soldier
Shaadi ke baad – major sahib

Shaadi ke pehle – pyaar hona hi tha
Shaadi ke baad – meri saath esa kyu hua

Shaadi ke pehle – jeevan saathi
Shaadi ke baad – bachcho ke baad, bangaye hathi

Shaadi ke pehle – deewana
Shaadi ke baad  – anjaam

Shaadi ke pehle – laila majnoo
Shaadi ke baad – dono majnoon

Shaadi ke pehle – taj mahal
Shaadi ke baad  – sadak

Shaadi ke pehle – tammana
Shaadi ke baad – tamasha

In a small town in India , a person decided to open up his Bar business, which was right opposite to the Temple .  The Temple & its congregation started a campaign to block the Bar from opening with petitions and prayed daily against his business.

Work progressed.  However, when it was almost complete and was about to open a few days later, a strong lightning struck the Bar and it was burnt to the ground.

The temple folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, till the Bar owner sued the Temple authorities on the grounds that the Temple through its congregation & prayers was ultimately responsible for the demise of his bar shop, either through direct or indirect actions or means.

In its reply to the court, the temple vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection that their prayers were reasons to the bar shop’s demise. As the case made its way into court, the judge looked over the paperwork at the hearing and commented:

I don’t know how I’m going to decide this case, but it appears from the paperwork, we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer and  we have an entire temple and its devotees that doesn’t.’

Ek aadmi apni biwi ka antim sanskar karke ghar ja raha tha. Achanak     

 bijli chamki, badal garje, jor se barish start ho gayi.                   

 Dukhi aadmi: Lagta hai pahunch gayi.

Social Work

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Happy mujhe Deepu ne social work karne par bahut maara.

Moga kaisa social work?

Happy maine kabristaan k gate par Welcome ka board lagaya tha.

Happy: Agar naariyal k ped par chadh jaao to engineering college ki ladkiya

Dikh jayengi.

Moga: Phir haath chhod dena to medical college ki bhi dikh jayengi.

Surprise

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Moga Returns Home After 1 year Ask to Son: Teri Maa kahan hai?

Son: Wo to pichhle saal hio mar gait hi.

Moga crying: Mujhe bataya kyun nahi?

Son: socha surprise doonga.

Happy badly wanted to become a great man. So after a long research……

 he made a New addition to Newton’s low

“Loos Motion can never be done in Slow Motion”.

Birthday

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Happy’s 60th b’day..

Moga: ye cake pe bulb q lagaya hai?

Happy: 60 candles lagane me mushkil ho rhi thi isiliye 60 watt ka bulb laga diya.

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